


Nothing Left to Lose

by ElpisGalaxy



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Butterfly Miraculous, F/M, Light Angst, Peacock Miraculous, gabenath
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-02-03
Packaged: 2019-10-21 13:12:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17643467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElpisGalaxy/pseuds/ElpisGalaxy
Summary: After the Heroes's Day plan goes horribly wrong and Gabriel's secret identity gets exposed, Nathalie takes the peacock miraculous and uses it. The power granted to her has consequences that she never fully imagined. Will using it bring about change or will her efforts have been in vain.





	Nothing Left to Lose

The last thing Nathalie remembered was the transformation. After their plan went wrong and Scarlett Hawkmoth’s transformation was gone, she sensed that things were going to go downhill very quickly and instinctively had raced to the safe where her last resort was. The object that Gabriel had warned her never to use. The Peacock Miraculous, the item damaged to the point that had nearly killed his wife. At this point though, she had nothing left to lose. Her job as assistant to both Gabriel Agreste and Hawk Moth had consumed what little remained of her life. If they were both found out, everything would come crashing down. Gabriel wouldn’t be able to bring Emilie back, both of them would lose their jobs and freedom, and Adrien would be sent off to live with his nasty cousin Felix. 

Gabriel’s emotions of despair and anguish that she had used to form the monstrous moth protector had saved them but at a cost. The energy used to create it came from inside her and something was wrong as she felt herself continue to grow weaker long after the moth protector had disappeared. The darkness of the lair, once foreboding was now comforting as she felt herself disappearing into it. As the butterflies settled around her she found some comfort in the rustle of their wings. If she was going to die, at least she wasn’t uncomfortable. In her barely conscious state, she didn’t hear the noise of the elevator or Gabriel’s footsteps as he raced toward her motionless body surrounded by butterflies.

Gabriel’s voice in the distance slowly brought her back to consciousness. The voice encouraged her to transform back and not to let it consume her. A small amount of energy had somehow returned to her and it was enough for her to whisper “Feathers fall.” Instantly, the transformation dropped and Nathalie slowly came to. She found herself lying on the freezing ground with Gabriel looking down at her with a look of concern and fright. She was surrounded by butterflies that look partially akumatized and were now motionless. 

She felt Gabriel gather her in his arms and take her out of his lair. How he managed to do it so gracefully with that tiny elevator she would never know but she was glad to be out of the cold, gloomy space and in the bright light of the real world again. Even if the bright light was merely the lights in the mansion. 

Gabriel kneeled in front of her, waiting patiently for her to talk. He had thrust a hot cup of tea into her hands and Nathalie found more of her strength return as she drank the dark liquid. Periodically coughs would take over and she would spend what felt like minutes just coughing. Occasionally, their eyes met, and she looked away quickly. She had no problem making eye contact with her boss, but in this moment, the look in his eyes made her feel awkward. There was such concern in them that she only saw reserved for Emilie years ago and for Adrien in the few occasions that he saw his son. She didn’t know how it was supposed to make her feel.

While she was very much attracted to her boss, she had always presumed that he didn’t feel the same way about her and as a result kept her feelings a closely guarded secret. She had long ago decided that him being happy was good enough for her. When he had come to her with a crazy plan to revive his dead wife years ago, she had readily agreed. With Emilie back in the picture, she would not have to deal with her feelings and the implications they would have on her work life and Gabriel would be too distracted with his newly reunited family to pay her much attention again.

“I’m sorry sir,” Nathalie finally managed to say. Her voice was hoarse and weak. She coughed a few times to clear it before continuing. “I had to save you.”

“How many times have I told you never to use the peacock miraculous?”

“Too many times sir.” She smiled weakly. “Sometimes sacrifices need to happen. If your real identity was revealed to the world, we’d never be able to fulfill your wish. We got closer than ever today. With just a few more tries, we’ll be able to obtain both Miraculous.”

Gabriel placed his hand over hers. “Thank you for everything. I’m giving up my dream. I know I’ve said it quite a few times before, but I’ve been doing a lot of thinking over the past six months and it’s for real this time. I need to move on, I can’t keep hurting myself, my son, and you. Seeing you practically dead on the ground surrounded by dead akumas that had protected you made me realize that I can’t keep doing this.”

“But sir…” Nathalie protested. “You don’t need to do it for me. Bringing back Emilie is more important.”

The whole time he was talking, Gabriel’s hand remained on hers and Nathalie was busy trying to keep her face in the neutral position it was always known to be. While she was used to working in close proximity to her boss most of the time. There had never been a moment like this before. A moment far more intimate than anything she had ever experienced around him. She focused on her breathing, trying to keep herself calm and to prevent her face from turning the same color as the streak in her hair. As a result, she ended up tuning him out completely. So when he suddenly removed his hand and renounced Nooroo in front of her, her mouth dropped open.

“But sir…” she protested again. “What about your wish and what about Adrien?”

“It’s time I moved on. Adrien will be okay, convincing me to let him go to school was probably the best decision for all of us. He has friends now beyond the Bourgeois girl even if some of his friends aren’t the best influences and he’s happier than he’s been in years. And it made me realize that the main reason I was doing all of this for him when I should’ve just been there for him instead.”

“I see, I’m sorry sir. I should’ve been able to help better.” She paused to cough again. “I don’t want to be the reason that you’re giving this up.”

“Nathalie, it’s not your fault. It’s mine. Mine for getting involved with the miraculous in general, my fault for not stopping Emilie in time, and my fault for convincing you to help me. My actions are the reason you almost died today.”  
Nathalie didn’t have much of a response to that other than to look down at her shoes.

“Just rest for now.” Gabriel reassured her. “I should be able to handle things just fine. I don’t imagine Paris is going to do much today thanks to that Akuma attack.”

“Yeah, I don’t imagine much will be happening,” Nathalie smiled weakly. “Thank you, sir, I’m surprised you’re giving it up, but a lot of things about today have surprised me.”

“I intend to return it to the guardian as soon as I can. Thanks to Nooroo’s birthday party I was able to narrow down the location of the guardian very quickly so returning both to him should be no problem hopefully.”

“I’ll go with you. I was involved with the akumas just as much as you were even if I didn’t directly help until this last one. I’m just as guilty as you were since I hid your identity.”

A week had passed since the attack and Nathalie was mostly better. She still felt a bit chilly at times and had a lingering cough. However, she was able to work now just fine. Returning the miraculous’ back to the guardian had been easier than expected. He seemed mostly relieved to have them back for the first time in two hundred years. The damage of the Peacock Miraculous seemed to puzzle him and as soon as he knew more about it. He promised to contact them. Due to the both of them having used the miraculous’ for bad intentions, they were warned that the effects of the miraculous would still be haunting them for a long time. 

Breaking the addiction of using it was going to be the hardest thing for Gabriel. The empathetic powers would also probably remain for the both of them but would grow weaker over time. Nathalie wasn’t aware of the full extent of the empathy powers and had only assumed that they were active when the butterfly miraculous was.

Which meant he probably was able sense her feelings. But he had never acted on them or acknowledged them which meant he probably didn’t want to say anything until it interfered with both their jobs. While Nathalie was initially embarrassed, she soon realized that it meant nothing would probably change between them and that she could go on like normal.

And for around six months, nothing changed between them. She worked hard on scheduling meetings and keeping the press at bay once it had been announced to the public that Emilie had died. The press and almost everyone had luckily believed that she had died from cancer. Adrien didn’t believe the story at all and it had caused a rift between them for a bit but after encouragement from his girlfriend Marinette, Adrien and Gabriel had the first real conversation in a long time.

She wasn’t sure what had been said but it had improved things immensely although there was still a ways to go before things would go back to what they used to be. What came as more of a surprise was when Gabriel suddenly popped into the office, asked her to stay for dinner with him and then left before getting an answer.  
Since she had nothing else to do, she figured she could. While her job made her less busy than it used to be, she still didn’t have much of a social life of her own 

“You know why we’re here don’t you?”

“Yeah,” Nathalie replied, her voice as neutral as possible. While she knew what was going to be discussed, she had no idea what the outcome of the conversation would be. It could go several different ways.

“Nothing about our relationship has been normal. You started as my assistant and after proving your competence. I got you involved with the miraculous and my scheme as Hawkmoth since you also knew Emilie and cared about her deeply. I knew you wouldn’t expose me, but I didn’t realize the other possibilities that could happen. My goal was to bring Emilie back and nothing else no matter the cost. I don’t remember when I fully became aware of your feelings for me. But I didn’t really care about it. Ignoring it was easier and as long as you did nothing, and the press didn’t catch wind of anything, I let it slide. You were too good at your job and I didn’t want to lose you too.”

“I’m sorry sir,” Nathalie replied. “I didn’t mean for it to happen. My goal was always to help you like the job description required, but somewhere along the way everything changed. I’m not sure when or why. If you want me never to acknowledge this again, I can do it. I don’t let my feelings interfere with my work.”

“That’s not entirely necessary,” Gabriel said. “I didn’t realize it at first, but I care for you quite deeply as well. And I’m willing to give things a try. Emilie may have only officially died this year, but she was in that state for years and it was like she had died back then. Our workplace relationship has never been a normal one and I imagine that if we give things a try and they don’t work out, that it’d be fairly easy to go back to normal. But I want to ask your permission first as I don’t want to play with your feelings unintentionally.”

“Thanks, I appreciate that.” Nathalie said with a smile. “I would be willing to give things a try.”

**Author's Note:**

> I've been slowly working on this piece and have been getting stuck. I was originally writing this for Gabenath Secret Santa, but had to drop out partway through due to writers block, becoming even more busy, and just other stuff. The story since then has changed a lot and hopefully I can come back to that original idea. I also struggle with writing romance so while I think its implied, its not really as obvious as it is with other Gabenath works and hopefully with practice I'll get to that point as well. Thank you for reading the first writing I've posted to the internet in about four years.


End file.
